Here is why people stay in bad relationships

Here is the gist of the week,

Have you ever wondered why people stay in bad relationships?

People stay in bad relationships for a lot of reasons, and it’s not as simple as "they don’t know better" or "they’re afraid to leave." It’s much deeper than that. Let’s take a moment to really dive into this, because what’s happening here is about more than just the relationship itself—it’s about the inner work that’s either being avoided or misunderstood.

1. Fear of Being Alone

The thought of being alone can feel paralyzing. For some, it feels like being without a partner is the ultimate sign of failure. Society has fed us this narrative that if you’re single, you’re somehow incomplete or a failure. So what do people do? They cling to relationships that drain them because the fear of loneliness outweighs their desire for true happiness. But here’s the truth: being alone isn’t the enemy—staying disconnected from your own self-worth is.

2. Comfort in Familiarity

Sometimes, the dysfunction becomes so familiar that it feels like home. I’ve seen it time and time again—people stay because the chaos, the fights, the emotional rollercoaster has become their “normal.” There’s safety in what’s familiar, even if it’s toxic. But what’s really happening here? They’re avoiding the discomfort of the unknown. Growth happens outside your comfort zone, and leaving a bad relationship requires courage to step into that discomfort and trust that better is out there.

3. Low Self-Worth

Here’s where we get real: when you don’t believe you’re worthy of more, you settle for less. It’s as simple as that. People stay in bad relationships because somewhere, deep inside, they’ve convinced themselves that this is as good as it gets. But let me tell you something—your worth is not tied to how someone else treats you. You are enough, as you are, right now. The problem isn’t the relationship—it’s the belief system that’s been built around self-doubt and unworthiness.

4. Hope for Change

Oh, the hope that one day things will change. It’s intoxicating, isn’t it? The belief that if you just hang on a little longer, the person you’re with will finally become the version of them that you deserve. Here’s what I’ll say: people don’t change unless they want to. Period. And staying in the relationship, hoping and waiting, is only a form of self-sacrifice. You deserve love as it stands right now, not love that might someday become something else.

5. Fear of Failure

We can’t ignore the fact that pride and ego play a role here. Ending a relationship can feel like admitting defeat, and for some, that’s unbearable. Especially if you’ve invested years, emotions, energy into it. But staying in something that doesn’t serve you out of fear of failing is like choosing to live in a cage because you're too afraid to test the strength of its walls. You don’t fail by walking away—you free yourself.

6. Love—Or What They Think is Love

Let’s not pretend that love isn’t part of the equation. But what is love without respect, trust, and emotional safety? Love isn’t supposed to hurt. Love shouldn’t make you feel small. Sometimes, people stay because they confuse attachment and dependency with love. They believe that the highs and lows are part of the passion. The love of your love should not send you into depression or therapy. Real love nourishes you.

Let Me Leave You With This:

You stay because there’s a lesson you haven’t yet learned about you. And that’s okay. But staying in something that doesn’t serve your soul only prolongs the lesson. The moment you realize that your peace is more important than the relationship you’re clinging to, you’ll set yourself free. The only relationship you need to be committed to is the one you have with yourself.

To speak with me or need my help to get out of a bad relationship, please book a session with me here