How Low Self-Esteem Affects Your Income
HOW LOW SELF-ESTEEM AFFECTS YOUR INCOME
Nkechi sat in the corner of the open-plan office, her desk tucked away like an afterthought. She liked it unnoticed, and invisible. She had been at the company for three years, quietly doing her work, meeting deadlines, and avoiding the spotlight. Her colleagues called her dependable, but never brilliant. She hated the word "brilliant." It felt too heavy, too bright for someone like her.
The email came on a Tuesday morning. A new position had opened up. Team Lead for their department. Nkechi read it twice, her heart thudding in her chest. She knew the role was perfect for her; she had been handling most of the responsibilities unofficially anyway. But as she stared at the screen, a familiar voice whispered in her mind: You’re not ready. You’re not good enough.
She closed the email and went back to her work.
At lunch, she overheard her colleague Chuka talking about applying for the role. Chuka had joined the company just a year ago, and while he was confident, sometimes annoyingly so. Nkechi knew his work wasn’t as thorough as hers. Still, he spoke with an ease that made people listen. He didn’t hesitate to share his ideas in meetings or to take credit for successful projects. Nkechi often wondered what it felt like to carry that kind of certainty.
By Friday, Chuka’s name was already being floated as a strong candidate for the role.
That weekend, Nkechi visited her mother in Lagos, Nigeria. The house smelled of pepper soup and old wood, a comforting mix that always reminded her of home. As they sat on the veranda peeling oranges, Nkechi mentioned the job opening.
“Why didn’t you apply?” her mother asked, frowning.
“I don’t think I’m ready,” Nkechi replied, avoiding her mother’s gaze.
Her mother sighed deeply and set down an orange. “Nkechi, do you know what your problem is? You’ve built a house inside your own shadow and now you’re afraid to step out into the light.”
The words stung because they were true.
On Monday morning, Nkechi walked into the office to find an email announcing Chuka’s promotion. Her stomach twisted as she read it. She imagined him sitting at his new desk, earning a higher salary for doing work she had quietly mastered long ago. The whisper in her mind returned: This is what happens when you hide.
That evening, as she packed up to leave, Nkechi opened her laptop and began drafting an email to HR. It wasn’t about a promotion or a raise she wasn’t ready for that yet but about joining a public speaking workshop offered by the company. It was a small step, but it felt monumental.
As she hit send, she thought about what her mother had said. Maybe it was time to leave the shadow behind not all at once, but piece by piece, until there was nothing left of it but memory.
Low self-esteem doesn’t just affect how we see ourselves; it shapes how others see us too. It keeps us from asking for what we deserve and from stepping into opportunities that could change our lives. Like Nkechi, low self-esteem isn’t just a feeling—it’s a tax. It deducts from your voice, your value, your ability to say, “I am here".
P:S - Did you miss my conversation with UZOR ARUKWE? here is a recap
I saw and met BAMBAM on set for the first time when we filmed "Love in every word".
https://youtube.com/live/fgjJeITFoj8
