HOW YOUR ATTACHMENT STYLE MAY BE AFFECTING YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.
HOW YOUR ATTACHMENT STYLE MAY BE AFFECTING YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.
I have spent the last 2 months discussing attachment styles. This morning, I will like to explore how our attachment styles may be affecting our relationship with God. Are you ready?
We talk about attachment styles in romantic relationships, friendships, and parenting but rarely do we feast on how deeply they may shape our relationship with God.
For example, if you grew up anxious, always trying to earn love, approval, or safety, there’s a chance you now approach God the same way. You pray hard. You fast harder. But deep down, you're not convinced He really loves you unless you perform.
If your style is avoidant, maybe you keep God at arm's length. You believe in Him, but intimacy scares you. So you know about Him, but don’t really know Him. Quiet time feels forced. Vulnerability feels unsafe even with God.
If you're disorganized, having faced trauma or inconsistent love, your relationship with God might feel like a tug-of-war. One moment, you cling. The next, you push Him away. You're waiting for Him to fail you like others have.
Even those who are securely attached can find that when life hits hard, old wounds reopen, and suddenly, trusting God may not come so easily.
So what if your "faith struggles" are actually attachment wounds in disguise?. Your fear of silence from God mirrors that parent who never responded? or your hustle for "worthiness" reflects the conditional love you grew up with?
The sweet news is, God isn’t repelled by your insecurity or independence. Infact, he redefines "secure attachment." That is why he said, if you are anxious, "Cast all your cares, not some but all upon me. (1 Peter 5:7). Or if you are avoidant, he says "Come near, and I’ll come near to you." (James 4:8).
Healing your attachment wounds could be the most spiritual work you ever do and that is why I am rooting for you.
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